cheryllai.lj.com

random.

2009-12-27T15:17:58Z

was blown away by sylvia's voice on singapore idol.
wants to start watching HEROES again.
wants to watch all the movies showing now: bodyguards and assassins, sherlock holmes, avatar and even alvin and the chipmunks 2.
sch is starting in two weeks time. groans. bidding on the 29th. (i hate the bidding system)

thank God for all the friendships this year.
and grace in every circumstance.

did you know?

2009-11-24T13:17:30Z

handphones are for making calls and ANSWERING calls.
for sending messages including REPLYING messages.

i thought everyone knew that.

and it really doesnt help that some people dont know the courtesy of helping/accomplishing tasks entrusted to them when some people are really busy :(

forgive me.too much studying and sudden requests,tasks.
maybe you wont wana talk to me when im stressd or rather, i dont like to talk when im stressed.
rarrrr.

finding.

2009-11-02T05:33:25Z

its been a long time since i last woke up crying/cried awake?
it was really really random. and weird x=
they say God speaks through dreams.
but i guess not this huh. cos i cant seem to make sense out of the dream.
still, it was scary to really wake up crying, with tears and all.

the only sense i made out of the dream was that i felt really helpless in the dream.
helpless?its complicated. this person not trusting what i say the other person did to me..
there was glitter glue too.

ohmy.wad a weird dream.

last week/2weeks, i had 3 fren's fathers passing on. its like crazily scary and sad :(
den i thought about losing my dad. think i will jus die seriously.
makes me wana pray even harder for my parents. at least for now, that they'l stop bickering w each other.
alamak how old already stil keep fighting. den il have t be the mediator and hear both of them tel their story :B

on one of the days last week, or maybe since 2 weeks ago? ive decided to give my best at living each day meaningfully.
im making an effort to invest in lives again.
im proud of myself.muaha.

keep guiding me.and giving me the strength to stand when i fall.

three weeks to final terms ah.haven start studying. help help

towards end of semester one.

2009-10-28T11:17:46Z

two more weeks before we get a week break den final term exams will start.
time really flies. and like we were saying, i cant imagine going through another 7 more semesters, with such intensity.
uni is tough.at least for me.
to think we were whining bout the crazy syllabus for jc in 2 yrs. and now, its even crazier for only 3months.
need to start mugging already. nxt sem i shall attempt to be a perpetual mugger so i wont lag so much in the readings.

its already coming close to the end of the year.and.i think i mentioned before, the first half of the year was pretty much of a blur.
nxt year il be twenty already. thats like so old. and i predict il fall into depression on my birthday lol

Why are you striving these days
Why are you trying to earn grace
Why are you crying
Let me lift up your face
Just don't turn away

Why are you looking for love
Why are you still searching as if I'm not enough
To where will you go child
Tell me where will you run
To where will you run

And I'll be by your side
Wherever you fall
In the dead of night
Whenever you call
And please don't fight
These hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you

Look at these hands and my side
They swallowed the grave on that night
When I drank the world's sin
So I could carry you in
And give you life
I want to give you life

Cause I, I love you
I want you to know
That I, I love you
I'll never let you go.

cheryllai @ 2009-10-28T13:36:00

2009-10-28T05:39:51Z

cheryl wans t get back her fitness, den join a sports cca nxt sem!
cheryl will TRY not procrastinate again!
run,swim,statics..
but.she needs t find time t do 'em ><

cheryllai @ 2009-10-17T00:04:00

2009-10-16T16:05:02Z

think im depressed. dont ask. ):

cheryllai @ 2009-10-15T15:43:00

2009-10-15T07:43:48Z

i am trying to enjoy school.

put-ed a smile on my face.SO CUTE! :D

2009-09-17T13:34:43Z

I NEED 48HRS A DAY

2009-09-16T16:09:35Z

THINGS TO DO FROM NOW TILL END OF RECESS WEEK (27TH SEPTEMBER):

SOUTH EAST ASIAN FIELDTRIP REPORT 3 PAGES (28SEPT)

PSYCHOLOGY ASSIGNMENT 2 PAGES (2OCT)

SOCIAL WORK INDIVIDUAL REPORT (16OCT)

STUDY FOR STATS, PSYCH AND SINGAPORESTUDIES MID-TERM TESTS

haha.but its funny to see everybody getting stressed up.

cheryllai @ 2009-09-12T03:00:00

2009-09-11T19:00:55Z

i know im stronger than this.

cheryllai @ 2009-09-10T02:30:00

2009-09-09T18:31:04Z

when i am weak; You are strong.

never will i, ever, leave You.

not the whole thing.

2009-09-09T14:33:05Z

its time i start working my guts out.
church/ running/ reading/ etc

readings..

2009-09-04T07:42:13Z

trying to catch up on my readings.
and i jus realised, im lagging so much behind -.-
and makes me wonder. since the lecture has moved on.
do i still needa read them?
lol.rarr.brain's gona explode

its me.

2009-08-27T06:38:46Z

third week. record. that i can remember of.
im already starting to skip school on the third week?!
blame it on the crazily heavy rain and bad tummy x=
and the insane fact that i have to travel so far for a 2 hr lesson (which i do not understand a thing that the prof is saying)

im afraid that this is gonna spark off my skipping school habit again ._.

and can i also say that im 100% made up of lazy bones. im so lazy to start studying.
i have not completed any reading at all. i only remember attempting to do so. like. on the first few days of school.
and since then, i never touched anything.
its just, going to school, attempting to listen during lectures, home, slack.

ahhhhh..why did i even hate working during the hols. its like so much better den being buried under those disgusting heaps of readings to do.

how can they lie to us. those evil jc tutors. that jc is the toughest period of our lives.

this is why i'm loving my timetable<3

2009-08-17T17:33:18Z

before my livejournal gets frozen by the administrator..

2009-05-08T16:40:34Z

UPDATES!
after getting my results, it was horrible too, waiting for the letters.
but thank God x100, i received all three letters,on the same day.
someone told me my mom mustve kept it from me till all three are received.lol
im most probably going for NUS FASS (:
PSYCHOLOGY <3 (its a since young kinda thing)
i cant wait to start school..

and second, i passed my rtt! (rider theory test)
hilarious.me and frens booked 4 sessions of e-trial and i literally did the 10 trial tests over and over for like at least 3 times(=1500questions).
til i could memorise the answers.haha.but it was good.cos i only took 5mins to pass the actual test.
its funny to see the two person beside you being so stressed out by you and admiring the beautiful 6letter word on your screen.
P-A-S-S-E-D. muaha

next biggest challenge, my practicals.booo..
its still fun.but i really hate failing -.-
il be going for my 4th Lesson 1. rar
im like disaster to them.crashing into the parked bikes, speeding into the instructors..
laughs out loud at myself.

imisscanoeingimisscanoeingimisscanoeing

2009-04-06T16:38:57Z

jus came back from dinner w my favourite people before chengyew leaves to serve the nation.
haven met them for soooo long. prolly more than a month.
friday,supper/dinner again for the rest of the guys going in for army.
friday and saturday training~
nationals starts on tuesday.gawsh.thats like soo soon.
thinking back, i was probably dying from frequent adrenaline rushes and rapid heartrates.

canoeing is prolly one of the best thing in my life.
best part of my life.

im feeling gvf4u5f984jcr89egg954ig again.>< hate it

bringmeback.

heart of worship.

2009-03-29T16:11:14Z

today i thanked God for saving me.
made me who i am today.

/if someone stays unchanged, then why stay.?

confused.

2009-03-09T16:56:02Z

i dont know what im doing sometimes.
and i get so irritated with myself.
wakeup,cheryl.

cough is killing me.help.

thank God.

2009-03-07T03:15:27Z

like a friend said, all the pre results emotions are all once in a lifetime.
and while he said that, i was whining all the way cos i was like less than an hour before receiving mine.
i wana blog this down so 10 years down the road, i can stil rmb how was it like to feel totally clueless and helpless over the results.

i had a major mood swing on monday, and i couldnt stop crying at night.i thot it was a bad omen.lol.i was hoping results are out the nxt day,so i wont have to dread it for so long.
i cant rmb wad happened on tues and wed. wed a friend came to keep me company. cos i would be feeling crap if i was alone.
thursday, me and my colleague couldnt take it at work. so we took half day.
i went for prayer meeting and felt a lot better after that.
went home. and reality sank back in. horrrible night.
FRIDAY 6TH OF MARCH: i woke up at 10+ actually refusing to wake up, had the crazy idea of sleeping through the whole thing.but i didnt.
so i went to meet a friend for lunch, and managed to take my mind off it for an hour or two. and as it drew closer, my heart jus couldnt stop racing.
felt so horirble i wanted to run home and hide. i really wanted to run away from it.loser right.lol.i omost cried.omost.
so i went to meet another friend at the bus stop and we took bus to sch.
met so many sch mates on the buss.

then we reached the hall, sat w our classmates.and ms lai gave away the certs for the 3As and 4As..
it took like realllly long...but i felt reallly happy for all of them.my team mates and some friends. ;D
so then, after all those smart people, we are getting our own from our CT. i tot i was going to pass out as i signed those papers to receive my testimonial and result slip.
even before friday, i already planned: LOOK AT IT OUTSIDE OF SCHOOL.
so i literally snatched my results from my ct and scampered off lol.
and i thot i heard vaguely he said: not bad. but i jus went my way.lol

so then i went to find my fren and she totally broke down. results not too good. so i brought her out of sch and took any bus that came, with my results slip tucked in btw all the brochures and magazines the sch gave.
so we took the long ride and ended up at tamp mall.so we got a place and sat down.
it was really funny. cos i bet i looked the MOST composed and normal being in that school hall. with rachel loi of course.cos she didnt see hers either.we are such jokers X)
yuup.so i kept my fren company all the way. felt so horrible. and sad for her. all the hardwork and effort. but i know she'l make it somehow! :) whichever road she takes :)
so we sat at yoshi and talked.i understood how she feel. dont know how to face THE parents.
all the way, i was so glad i didnt see my results slip.i still think i made the right choice.lol.
cos either good or bad, i wouldnt be in the right position to console her.
den later my captain called and talked to me over the phone. and she said
:hey! you saw ur results redi not
me: no
captain: not bad wad!
me:?!?! how u noe sia. even before i see
(sudden realization: my coach prolly had access to all our results)
me:....
wahh.that feeling was weird.how can she know my results before i do.lol
and so she came to join us.and talked to my dear fren also, trying to make her feel better.
and i forgot to tell her not to mention bout my results, if not she'l make the other fren feel worse.
and she did.(though i was kinda happy to know i did "not bad" which is duno relative to wad.lol)
and captain said to me again: eyy you really did not bad.
den my sad fren: i think you shouldve done well..
whoaa.my heart sank :( i really feel so bad for her :( and i knew how she mustve felt.
cos all along, her results were always better den us.

yup.so we kept her company and sent her home.den i took out my slip, and finally looked at it.
my vision zoomed in on an ugle "D" for physics.rarrr.
but overall, i did wayyy beyond myself.
its like a miracle come true. really. i guess few who knows me really well should noe how i feel.
my results before alevels were atrocious.like really.
im really overwhelmed w joy and thankfulness.

He always pulls me through.
im grateful.more than grateful.

majorswing.

2009-03-02T14:58:00Z

im amazed how i know myself so well this time round.
as expected, this week will be grueling for me.
work and all the emotions running all over the place.
its that bad, even the usual walk home was.. . .

trust/grace.
serenity

familiar smell

2009-02-25T17:02:02Z

today i saw a really big and beautiful rainbow (:
and its amazing how some particular smell/scent will bring back senses of familiarity and warmth; memories.

icant wait to go back home on saturday (:
the morning sun, bus 93, the smell of the greens, the beautiful scenery, the reservoir water, paddle, chio craft, and awesome people.

ilove doing things ilove.
ilove emptying my mind of everything at the end of the day, on my bed, looking into the sky.
and then thank God for everything, and pray for the an even greater day to come.
ilove just knowing He is always there.

is it just me?

2009-02-23T13:16:17Z

i will give it to you at first,
but if u start asking for it, i wont.
and then if you stop asking for it,
i might just give it to you again.

limits, tolerance, capacity.
more..

and i really that God for e**
its.deep.and heartfelt and i know mutual too
hahaha :)
maybe we should have a slogan like:
with e**, who needs bfs?
LOL.

going for good.

2009-02-19T17:04:46Z

too many people left, leaving and are going to leave in the future.
that usually marks the end of the story.
the story bout me and you.
because, this time, the time you leave,
its a whole new chapter again.

maybe someday, i might ~~want to~~ leave too.
some day.

i will miss minneh. :'(

perspectives.

2009-02-12T16:35:26Z

its the way you choose to see things.
half empty or/ half full.

sometimes, vision's blurred.
thats why cannot see.

think.